Free Funny Jokes
 
  JOKE CATEGORIES
 
Jokes Archive
Animal Jokes
Blind Jokes
Business Jokes
English Jokes
Computer Jokes
Management Jokes
True Stories
Bar Jokes
Redneck Jokes
Dirty Jokes
Wedding Jokes
Female Jokes
Program Jokes
Kid Jokes
Funny Instructions
Funny Names
Naughty Jokes
Crude Jokes
Celebrity Jokes
Classic Jokes
Golf Jokes
Birthday Jokes
Yo Mama Jokes
Retirement Jokes
Science Jokes
Sports Jokes
Food Jokes
Military Jokes
Blonde Jokes
Misc Jokes
Christmas Jokes
 
   
 
  JOKE INDEX
 
  A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
 
   
 
   JOKE  
 
Fight against CO2

Isn't it time we required universal Federal licensing for use of Alka Seltzer, Fizzies, and Pop Rocks? Background verification, two week cooling off period, fingerprinting, mandatory fizz locks. No gas release in excess of one liter. No automatic unloading - no motorized or wind-up Pez dispensors!

CO2 kills! Suffocation! GREENHOUSE EFFECT! Save our children!

Minorities are put at risk! I want a National War on CO2! We already know how Belgium was decimated by Coke-a-Cola. Can we afford to risk American lives so the small cliques of fantatics and zealots can exercise their bubbling pornographic appetites? How many children must die before we act!

Burning the flag releases CO2, Hitler's crematoria released CO2, firebombing Dresden released CO2, nuking Hiroshima released CO2 - how much clearer must it be made?

And what about NO2? SO2? ClO2? Are we about to discriminate on the basis of Period Table group number? Renumbering the groups ws not enough. Renumbering the groups will NEVER be enough! I say, "NEVER!" Every elemental group must realize its full electrochemical potential and oxidation state, and all its lesser oxidation states as well - with equal representation!

Today it is baking soda and vinegar. Tomorrow it will be sodium hydroxide and concentrated sulfuric acid. By the end of the week butyllithium/TMEDA will be poured into Magic Acid by the pound! By the ton! WHERE WILL IT STOP!

Exotherms, global warming, penguins sweated to death... all because some MONSTER wanted a little fizz. Isn't that the way it always starts, with a "little" CO2 in a Bierstube in Munich? Computer models and their renormalized data are unequivocal: 44.0104!

Mommy, daddy, does your child breathe CO2?

Put an end to the CO2 nightmare before it's too late!
Rate This Joke ( )
 
   
   
  NEWEST FUNNY JOKES
 
Christmas Joke
Blonde Parade (PG)
It Won't Be Long (PG)
Why Do Blondes Have Blue Eyes? (G)
BLONDES CAN'T COUNT (R)
Ransom Note (PG)
Blonde in the Fridge (R)
Cliff (PG)
Buying Supplies (G)
Blonde Skeleton (PG)
Do As Daddy Says (PG)
Has a Blonde Been in Your Refrigerator? (X)
The Wave (G)
Lipstick on the Streering Wheel (X)
 
   
  TOP RATED JOKES
 
Blonde Mating Call (PG) 05, Sep 2006
Superman 02, Jun 2006
Blonde - Tracks (PG) 05, Sep 2006
Things a good dog remembers 13, Jul 2006
Computers are like air conditioners 27, May 2006
Lipstick on the Streering Wheel (X) 05, Sep 2006
Michael Jackson 02, Jun 2006
female jokes :Jamaica 20, Jun 2006
Redneck Joke:Double Shot of Redneckness 11, Jun 2006
Funny Instructions 02, Jun 2006
 
   
 Partners: Funny Facts · Funny Pictures · Funny Signs · Funny Images · Funny Insults · Ugly Pictures · Tongue Twisters · Yo Mama Jokes · Funny Jokes Free Funny Jokes © Copyright 2006 - 2012 · All Rights Reserved · Privacy Policy